PrumpTutin's Fortress
A note from Joe: You spoke. I listened. Shocking, I know.
The poll results are in, and you've sentenced me to Tuesdays and Fridays. Maybe Sundays if the mood strikes or the world does something particularly stupid. Which, let's face it, happens most Sundays.
A few of you also mentioned my essays run long. Fair point. When I get rolling on PrumpTutin or the healthcare scam or why war is humanity's favorite hobby, I tend to... continue. So, here's the deal: anything over 500 words gets a 100-word summary up top. Think of it as literary mercy.
Audio's still there for everything. Because sometimes you just want to hear an 80-year-old ex-programmer rant while you're doing dishes or dodging traffic.
Thanks for sticking around through the Substack chaos and the Ghost migration. You're good people. Even when you're wrong about my word count.
Summary: The Conservative Mind
Conservatives build mental fortresses from mythology and fear when reality threatens their pecking order. PrumpTutin perfected this—stolen elections, deep state conspiracies, endless victimhood while holding power. The pattern repeats: reds under beds, satanic daycares, immigrant caravans. Each generation needs fresh panic to sell. Fox, NRA, InfoWars built billions monetizing terror. The fortress isn't philosophy—it's business. Putin shows the endgame: murder journalists, jail dissidents, make truth illegal. They'll fail like all fortress empires—win so completely they forget what they're defending. Just machinery grinding on, protecting nothing. The tide rises. They never learn.
The Conservative Mind
August 8, 2022. FBI agents find classified documents in trump's bathroom. Nuclear secrets next to the gold toilet. He screams witch hunt. Every criminal screams witch hunt now. That's the playbook.
The tide doesn't give a damn about your fortress.
Every conservative builds the same walls. The pecking order tilted. Someone else got rights. This cannot stand.
So, they build. Memory becomes mythology. Fear becomes mortar. The past that never was becomes worth killing for.
The paradox: brittle as chalk, vicious as cancer. Always the victim, especially when pulling the trigger. Robbed while robbing. Persecuted while writing the laws.
Enter PrumpTutin.
Trump, January 6, 2021: "Fight like hell or you won't have a country anymore." They fought. People died. He watched it on TV like a game show.
January 2, 2021: "I just want to find 11,780 votes." The exact number to steal Georgia. Not even trying to hide the crime anymore.
Putin shows the endgame. Politkovskaya shot dead, 2006. Navalny poisoned, jailed, silenced. This is conservatism without constraints. Churches blessing the murderers. History illegal to remember. Truth itself becomes treason.
The fortress was always built on sand. The golden age was never golden. Emmett Till murdered in 1955 while they praised American values. Jefferson raped Sally Hemings while writing about liberty.
Every good old day was good for maybe 15% of the population. The rest were property, servants, or targets.
But the fortress mind can't admit this. Can't lose fairly. Losing would mean the walls were wrong all along. So, reality becomes the enemy. Every investigation is persecution. Every fact is fake news. Every election they lose was stolen.
The conspiracy grows to explain each failure. Deep state. Global elites. Jewish space lasers. Anyone but them. Anything but the truth: the fortress was always a prison.
Each generation needs fresh panic. 1950s: reds under beds. 1980s: satanic daycares that never existed. 2000s: gay marriage destroying families that were already destroyed. 2020s: drag queens, critical race theory, caravans of diseased immigrants.
They're coming for your children. Always your children. Because fear sells.
Fox Corporation built twenty billion in market cap selling rage. The NRA hawks fear for $250 million yearly. InfoWars peddled $165 million in tactical taint wipes to the terminally frightened. Prison corporations getting rich on mandatory minimums. Defense contractors billing billions for walls that don't work against threats that don't exist.
The fortress isn't philosophy. It's a business model.
PrumpTutin weaponized this perfectly. Hold the Supreme Court, gerrymander the states, own the airways—and still cry victim. Still claim oppression. The fortress doesn't protect anymore. It just performs protection. Endless theater for the terminally frightened.
They'll fail the way all fortress empires fail. Win so completely they forget what they were defending. When you've criminalized dissent, rewritten history, made truth illegal—what's left?
Just the machinery grinding on. Consuming everything. Protecting nothing.
The grift eating itself.
The tide rises. The fortress floods. Some asshole in the ruins insists the walls should've been higher.
They never learn.
That's why they always lose.
But I worry.
